Thursday, September 13, 2012

Fundraising for Church Groups

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A great idea for a church fundraiser is putting together an yearly 'Church Feastival' where good food, carnival games, auctions, and house fun couple for a remarkable fundraising event. The idea is to attract a broad spectrum of the local people to your fundraiser by having something for everybody.

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The advantage to the church is that many newcomers will form a very distinct impression of your ministry and facilities that will in time translate into a larger congregation. And of course, there's all the remarkable things you can do with all the funds raised by your 'Feastival.'

Getting started

You'll need to dispose for carnival games, inflatable amusements, plenty of good food, live music, tickets, and all the other seemingly endless tasks any large fundraising event requires. All the time divide and conquer - split up all the major tasks among your organizing committee and don't overload any one person.

Approach local businesses and important congregation members for help with signature food items such as barbecue, fish fry, corn on the cob, regional specialties like oysters or Cajun shrimp, etc. Getting these items donated instead of purchased adds tremendously to the bottom line.

For live music, work with a booking agent who can line up the right talent for a church fundraiser crowd. You want ability entertainment that won't offend while still encouraging young and old to join in the fun.

Fundraising tips

There are lots of ways to raise funds with a big event. You can comprise supplementary fundraising activities like a bake sale, a cake walk, face painting, craft sales, and assorted carnival games.

Auctions can raise predicted amounts if you have desirable goods and services for sale. Group together linked smaller items into larger gift baskets and offer those through silent auction bids.

Do all that you can to make it easy to bid. Tape down bid sheets, pens, and descriptions next to each auction item. Make sure the descriptions are typed in large fonts so no one has to pull out their reading glasses to bid.

For large dollar value items, use a live auction format and a expert auctioneer when appropriate. people will donate unusual and vital items for a good cause, so put the word out well ahead of time to friends and local businesses about your auction fundraiser.

Publicity tips

To draw a big crowd, you have to get the word out about what a great event your 'Feastival' will be. Use your newsletter and email lists to send reminders to mark the day and generate a sense of anticipation well ahead of the event.

You can also use flyers, roadside signs, posters and other customary methods of attracting attention. Placing carnival rides where they can be seen by passing traffic is other good way to generate interest.

Most importantly, put together a press release and distribute it to all the newspapers, Tv and radio stations in your market. Make sure you put the most newsworthy aspect of your fundraiser in the overview paragraph up top. comprise pictures for use by newspapers and offer live broadcast spots to radio stations.

Church fundraiser wrap-up

Make your 'Church Feastival' an yearly event by creating the most fun, family-oriented day of entertainment possible. Publicize your event well ahead of time and also put the word out about how to donate goods and services.

Contract for carnival rides and inflatable rentals like a Moonwalk or jump house. dispose for great live entertainment and large quantities of exquisite food. Saturday or Sunday afternoons work best and remember to allow plenty of space for people to just spread out and enjoy everything.

Make your 'Feastival' your best church fundraiser ever!

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How to Hold a prosperous Fundraising Holiday Bazaar

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Holiday bazaars, usually held while the fall and winter, are a tradition for many churches, schools, charities and other nonprofit organizations. It is the best time of year for a fundraiser like this. People are getting into the holiday spirit and are seeing to buy craft items, homemade gifts and baked goods.

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It takes a team of volunteers to pull off a victorious fund-raising bazaar. It will also take any months of planning. But, after you have held one bazaar you will know how to do it it much good in hereafter years.

Here is a list of the positions you'll need to fill for a holiday bazaar committee:

Chairperson - In payment of seeing the volunteers to be the chair of the assorted positions, assists the chairpersons and oversees the entire bazaar.

Vendor Coordinator - Sends out the applications and release forms to the vendors, collects the money from the vendors.

Facility Coordinator - In payment of the setting up and taking down of the event, assurance and safety for the event. Oversees parking lot and traffic.

Money Coordinator - In payment of all the monetary transactions connected with the bazaar. Works with the treasurer of your organization.

Food Coordinator - In payment of the food for the vendors and volunteers, and food sold at the event.

Publicity Coordinator - In payment of the advertising. Prepares the flyers and promotional pieces.

Prizes and Raffles Coordinator - In payment of getting donations of prizes to be used as door prizes and raffle prizes

How your organization can raise money with a holiday bazaar

Vendor fees - payment for space rental, table rental, electrical hook-ups. You can also payment a ration of the sales the vendors make.

Vip Shopping - sell tickets to special "Vip" shopping hours prior to the main event. Sell hors d'ouvres and offer prizes as an incentive to buy Vip tickets.

Bake sales - Have a bake sale throughout the event. Holidays are a busy time of year and homemade baked goods are good sellers.

Raffles and Auctions - usually each seller is asked to donate an item to used as a prize.

Selling donated items - Have your own table selling donated items.

Food Concessions - Food service can be as clarify as a catered supper or as straightforward as coffee and donuts. At the least you should have drinks and snacks such as cookies and chips available for the vendors and shoppers to purchase.

Sell promotional items - If your organization has t-shirts, Cd's, recipe books, or any other you sell make sure you have them at the bazaar.

Holiday bazaars are usually held indoors because you don't want to worry about the weather. The most coarse time to hold a bazaar is on Saturday. Or you can have a two day event and start it on Friday evening.

Allow plenty of time for the vendors and crafters to set up their tables. If you can set up the night before the bazaar as well as the day of the bazaar - all the better. Be sure to furnish help and safety for the the vendors.

Try to make your holiday bazaar unique. If there is something that your organization or school is noted for, find a way to capitalize on this. For example, I know of a church that sells handcrafted church mice Christmas ornaments every year at their Christmas bazaar. Every year a separate theme for the church mouse is created and members of the church make the ornaments throughout the year.

We all know about the fabulous volunteer who has been in payment of the annual bazaar for the last ten years. What happens when he or she is no longer willing or able to be in charge? Save all your files for a reference. good yet, compile a guide to planning your bazaar. This will help you greatly when you are seeing for a new volunteers to help you.

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Wednesday, September 12, 2012

The extreme Book commence Party

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There is no doubt that the day when you finally hold your book on your hands is one of the happiest days for a writer. After so many months -if not years- of writing, revising, editing, submitting and finally publishing you can see and touch your baby. This chance calls for a big celebration and what better way to send this book off unto the hands of your readers than with a Book initiate Party.

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One of the main considerations for this party is that you probably view of it way back when you were planning to write the book. The book marketing plan must be prepared before the book itself in order to ensure success. Considering the topic and audience of the book determines the theme of the party along with all the activities. The best days to do a Book initiate Party are whether Friday or Saturday, in order to get the most attendance. The time of day has a lot to do with the theme; it could genuinely be a picnic at the beach as a wine and cheese or masquerade during the evening.

Here are the key ingredients on The greatest Book initiate Party:

Theme: agree a theme directly associated to your book. Fiction books are perfect in this regard.
Invitations: originate one-of-a-kind invitation for the launch. You can get an inexpensive software program and create and print your own invitations. Ask to Rsvp.
News & Media: Remember to get ready a news release to mark the event and transmit it to your local newspaper at least four to six weeks in advance. Do not forget to send a personal invitation to your local news person.
Party Register: Have everybody register on your party register and comprise their e-mail and mailing address. Tell them they will be the first to know about your next book sale, book release, contests and giveaways.
Game or Contest: originate a game or contest colse to your book.
Food & Drinks: Have something uncomplicated to offer your guests on elegant serving plates.
Reading: Read portions of your books or better yet, have some of your guests read a short portion of it. If anything assisting has read your book ask them to tell the others about it. Nothing sells more than a satisfied reader.
Pictures: Take fullness of pictures with your guests while the party is going on. You might want to give the camera to one of them to take pictures as you visit with everybody there. The pictures will be great for promotional materials, websites and blogs.

Note: You might want to have a release form ready for all the attendants to sign in reference to authorization to post their pictures online or any printed materials without compensation.

Sell: Offer extra discounts to your guests who buy 2 or more signed copies of your book. Have bookmarks, flyers and mail order forms for everybody and the ones who do not buy, they can take it home and order later. For those who don not buy on the spot you might want to offer them the same extra allowance if they order in the next 48 hours.
Follow Up: Send the guests a thank you note for advent and comprise 2-3 business cards with a small allowance offer for your book on the back for them to give to family or friends. Make sure your allowance has an expiration date in order to keep the book sales going on a regular basis.

That is it. Easy, fun and profitable! Let your imagination roll and originate The greatest Book initiate Party for you and your friends.

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Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Top 10 Ways To Get More population To Your Next Gig

For an up-and-coming band every gig is a vital step toward your success. Your shows are where you get the opening to prove yourself. They are your opening to do what you do best. A good gig can also have a ripple effect, securing you a loyal fan base and ensuring good crowds at time to come shows. So when you land a gig, the key is to make it count. Hours of institution and practice won't matter unless you have a decent crowd that can go back and tell their friends how great you are. Your mission is not only to kick ass on stage-but to convince other people to come and see you. Sure, it would be nice to be able to just focus on your music and let person else handle the promotions, but few unsigned bands have those kinds of resources. It's up to you to get people in the door.

With that in mind, I've put together a list of ways you can make sure you have a full house at your next gig.

1. Start early.

Don't wait until a week before your gig to start advertising. As soon as you have a booking, sit down with the band and come up with a strategy for marketing the show to the public. Remember, you're competing with about a million other things person can choose to do on a Saturday night-movies, other bands' shows, parties, sporting events. You want to get yourself on the calendar as soon as humanly possible, and give yourself abundance of time to remind people a few times before the show date.

2. Posters, flyers, and cards.

You have to have them. There's no excuse these days not to have cards, flyers, and posters. With the online digital printing websites you can upload your own art, or use their existing art to create marketing materials that are professional and eye-catching. Remember, you're competing with professional bands which have marketing departments and social relations people, so put some plan into it.

One way you can get some great art done for minuscule money is checking out high school and junior college art departments. Some of these young artists would love the opening to do your design work and earn a minuscule cash-and they'll fee you a mere fraction of the whole that a professional graphic designer would.

However, even if you can only go the old-fashioned route of hand-drawing a flyer and photocopying it on eye-catching colored paper, do it.

Make sure everybody in the band has stacks and that they're giving them out, hanging them up, and manufacture them available. Leave them at the record store hang them on society bulletin boards at schools, coffee shops, bookstores and libraries.

3. Get your family and friends involved.

These people can be your best allies as you start your career. people that love you are your cheerleaders. They are going to promote the hell out of your band even if they aren't particularly concerned in your style of music. Maybe grandma won't come to a show, but she knows a lot of people and can help spread the word. She's just the type of person who would relentlessly hand out your flyers to everybody and anyone, just because she loves you. Take a stack of flyers to each of your friends and family, tell them how leading it is for you to get people to your show, and ask them to spread the word. Unless they still haven't forgiven you for breaking their favorite crystal vase when you were eight-years-old, chances are they'll be happy to be part of your success.

4. Use Myspace, Facebook, and other online social networking tools.

Technology is one of the most considerable tools you have. If you are one of the last five people on earth without a MySpace or Facebook account, get one Now. Make sure you usually update the pages with news and show dates, upload Mp3's or videos of your songs, and retort when people leave you a message. Look for bands on MySpace with a similar style to yours and go through their "friends" lists-and ask those people to be your friends. You can create so much interest in your band with quarterly "farming" of these sites, even people who live in other cities and states can come to be fans and your impact can quickly go from being local to you having a national presence.

5. create a press release.

This sounds more involved than it is. Not just big names can create and circulate a press release. Basically, it is a formal record of something current-like a show or a new Cd release-that you can give to distinct media outlets. Sending a press publish doesn't ensure that you will get publicity, but it will right on get you noticed and the media folks in your town are going to pay attentiveness to your professionalism. Send your press publish to entertainment papers; corporate, public, and college radio stations; bloggers and online communities that feature local events.

Check out this site for a record of how to write a professional press release: http://www.publicityinsider.com/release.asp

6. Tell everybody you know-and don't know.

This is not the time to be shy. If you can get up in front of a crowd and pour your blood, sweat, and tears into your performance, you can assault up a conversation when you're out getting coffee and tell people about your show. Think of yourself as a verily cool Jehovah's Witness. Have flyers in your pocket and be ready to hand them out any time any place. A personal connection with someone, even for a incorporate minutes, is more compelling than a thousand flyers stuck to the side of a building.

7. Go to other shows and network.

Get out there and see other shows. Hang out before and after and talk to people about your music. The people you meet at a show are people you know are concerned in finding live performances. Again, manufacture a particular personal connection is one of the most sufficient ways you can create interest in your music. You can be cool and still be friendly. This is not the time to be stand-offish. In the starting you can't just rely on your music to attract people, because in the beginning, no one has heard your music. They're going to come to see you.

8. Offer to play a incorporate songs unplugged at an event to warm up the crowd.

In every city there are about a thousand things going on any given weekend. There are abundance of opportunities to warm up the crowd at a charity, a school play, an art show, or any other whole of events. You don't need to drag all the tool out. Go and play a incorporate songs acoustic. Give away a incorporate Cds in a raffle at the event. Ask if you can leave some flyers on the registration table so that when people come in they can grab one with their name tag or program. There are endless possibilities for getting yourself in front of people and giving them a minuscule taste of your music-plus, you might just get to preserve a worthwhile society or event.

9. Advertise a giveaway at the show.

People love free stuff. It's just a fact of life. It doesn't even have to be good free stuff, but if you advertise that you are giving something away, there is a much higher likelihood that more people will show up. Give away a incorporate discs, a incorporate t-shirts. If you have the cash, give away an iPod Shuffle () or some gift certificates. It is a small venture that will pay off in spades. Make sure you let everybody know-on flyers, on MySpace, and by word of mouth-what you're giving away and when.

10. Open for an established band a incorporate weeks before the gig.

Be a part of your indie community. Make friends and allies with other bands. If you can open for another band a incorporate weeks before your gig, you are going to give people a opening to see you in action. You'll have a ready-made audience you can pitch your upcoming show to. Hang out after your performance and work the room while you enjoy the main show and preserve your friends.

There are so many creative ways to promote your show, and these are just a few suggestions to get you going. Remember, if you don't promote yourself, no one else is going to. Be fearless and let the world know who you are and where your next show is going to be!

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10 Time administration Techniques

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Many of the population I work with have often only recently left full-time employment and are in the process of setting up their own freelance businesses. Quite a few struggle with how to use their time effectively. There are so many things to do and so many competing demands for our time that it can be difficult to know where best to invest it. So here are some thoughts:

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How is 10 Time administration Techniques

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1. Integrate your personal life with your pro life. You don't have two lives you have one. So resist the temptation to live as if you were still employed and trying to originate 8,9, or 10 hour days. If you feel that you want to post a blog on a Saturday evening then do it. If there is an important event with your kids on a Monday afternoon then go to it.

2. Make sure your daily, weekly and monthly tasks are set out in lists. Do the most important things on these lists first. I like to make a list on the evening before then do the most important thing on it the next morning - that's my most creative time. Just a straightforward paper list is fine.

3. Don't do things that you can authentically give to someone else to do. If you can get other someone to originate your website quicker than you could then do it, likewise your letter heads or business cards. If someone can do it quicker and more efficiently then outsource it to them.

4. Get the 'big' things' done first. That means not spending a lot of time over small decisions. Don't spend ages worrying about how your business card looks or the commas in your latest article. Get it done or move on (preferably both).

5. Try not to work in a communal area in your home. This is not always inherent to accomplish but if you can you'll be more sufficient without the distractions. Tv off, door closed, and keep interruptions to a minimum.

6. Invest money in time-saving decisions. If your sales letter, record or brochure is 80% done, don't spend the rest of the day looking for problems on it. Find someone else to proof read it - pay them if necessary. If you have need to originate new markets - consider looking a provider of business lists rather than trying to find new customers yourself.

7. Be disciplined with your personal and family time. Don't let population invade this. Dedicate hours in the day that you want to spend with your kids. Leave a message on your phone or an 'Out of Office message on your email responder to say that you are busy at that occasion and you will caress the caller as soon as you can.

8. Plan important appointments, plan them well in advance. If you have a talk or a pitch to give or a meeting with a customer, plan backwards and begin with the deadline. Diary in the tasks on days important up to it rather than trying to do all the tasks in one go - you'll be much more sufficient and focused this way.

9. Do what you feel is right at the time. Don't force yourself to do things like phone calls or letter writing if you aren't moved to do it at that time. Do some content or stock creation. If you aren't ready to do some serious work yet then choose a personal or family item on your list and do that first.

10. Build in some time for the unexpected. Never try to pack your day with activities that you don't have any space for any thing else. Most professionals build in a microscopic 'wiggle' time just in case of emergencies. A frantic customer rings desperately to speak to you. If you have some 'wiggle' time built in to your day then you can deal with that.

This is just a list of 10 things you can do to carry on your time - there are tons of others. Annotation in the box below if you have any more to add - we'll include it in a revised list later. Don't forget to put your name in the box at the top right of this page so you'll know when we release it.

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Christians In A Storm

Small Business Saturday - Christians In A Storm The content is nice quality and useful content, Which is new is that you simply never knew before that I do know is that I actually have discovered. Prior to the unique. It's now near to enter destination Christians In A Storm. And the content related to Small Business Saturday.

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Special Note- I originally wrote this report after Tropical Storm Allison struck Houston in 2001. From a practical standpoint Allison taught those of us in this area, that a storm doesn't have to be a hurricane to cause a great deal of damage. Of procedure 2005 saw the twin big storms of Katrina, and Rita. Many of those displaced found their way here to Houston. A great many are still enjoying our hospitality. Just as in 2001 the faith society did itself proud. May our Lord Jesus all the time give us the compassion, bravery, and wisdom to serve those experiencing disaster in his way, and his name.

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How is Christians In A Storm

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Tuesday June 5, 2001 marked the starting of a very moving time in the history of my popular Houston. We have seen thousands loose everything, and thousands of others ( Christians included ) rise to the occasion. That early summer day, Tropical storm Allison came to visit. There was some damage that Tuesday, but the storm moved quickly. Whole as such storms go it was close to the best case scenario.

Then came Friday, and Allison returned. This time from the north, this time moving slowly. At one point the storm became stationary. Over .3 billion in damages ! Tens of thousands of citizen forced from their homes. Some major hospitals closed, just when they may be needed most. One Memorial Herman with over 500 beds is still fulfilled, two weeks later. Every major highway, and dozens of major face streets covered in high water. At least 21 lives were lost. In less than a week the best case scenario, became a society nightmare.

However even before the rain stopped, stories of Christian compassion, and aid to others began to be written. At Lakewood Church one of the largest nondenominational churches in America, about 75 citizen had gathered for a couples class. By the time they got ready to leave the waters had risen so high they were stranded. Lakewood's premise remained high and dry in the middle of one of the hardest hit parts of town. Refugees from the considerable storm began arriving at their doorstep. Without need of legal sanction, and no advance preparation, those 75 classmates began a disaster protection that grew to hold over 3,000 clients. The largest of over 30 shelters that would be set up at the height of the storm.

Later Lakewood served as a Red Cross aid town where aid was doled out to those who had suffered losses. When it became apparent that Red Cross, and Fema aid would not bring relief soon enough, Lakewood combined with Second Baptist-Houston to create an adopt a house schedule to help get citizen on their feet faster. In the days that followed armies of Christians arrived at the two churches. From all over town, citizen of every denomination, race, and economic status gathered. Wet rotted carpets were pulled up, sheet rock removed. Mountains of donated food, clothing and bedding were distributed. Cleaning supplies and elbow grease were used to begin erasing traces of the damage.

If the story stopped here, it would be a great example of practical ministry in a time of crisis, but it continues. Many other churches served as shelters and in the days that followed Red Cross aid Centers. Dozens of new volunteers, many of them Christians were put straight through accelerated training, and put to work. Uniformed scouts, many of them Christians, many of them from forces sponsored by churches and other religious groups, walked up and down many flights of stairs to deliver supplies in large darkened Hospitals which had lost power.

I was trapped in my own subdivision that Saturday. That Sunday, unavoidable that my house was safe I worked at the protection nearest my house. There I had clients of the shelter, victims themselves offer to help sort clothes, set up cots, do whatever they could to fight the storm that had taken lifetimes of belongings. What they would not allow the storm to do, is take their faith, their need to contribute, or their self respect. I saw so many citizen praising the Lord as they brought donations of food, clothing and bedding. I saw young children arrival with their parents to happily donate old, seldom used toys to children who now had none. Unity Church of Christianity from an area across town less affected by the storm sent a large furnish of bedding and other supplies. A small troupe of Christian clowns and musicians arrived and asked to be allowed to entertain the children at the protection where I served. We of procedure immediately standard their offer to serve. They gathered the children in a large empty space of floor. They sang, they told stories, they even made balloon animals. The children, scared, at least temporarily homeless laughed.

When not busy elsewhere I did a lot of listening. I listened to frustrated survivors, and frustrated relief workers. I listened to children try to make the most of a situation they couldn't understand. These are just the stories I personally have heard or witnessed. I know that many other individual Christians, Churches, and religious groups served admirably. I just don't have the details close at hand. I do want to thank them for the efforts in crisis. I thank The Lord for providing them to serve.

I did not write this so you would feel sorry for Houston, or its people. Thousands in my society are still struggling to recover. However what I saw as this accident unfolded reinforced my faith that the Lord will furnish for us straight through our brothers and sisters in faith. What I do want everybody who reads this to learn, is what I call the chapter of Allison. No matter how bad the accident that strikes your community, you the individual Christian can be part of the solution. Those blankets you have stored away, and will likely never use mean so much to those who have none. If you can drive you can help. If you can set up a cot you can help. If you can scrub a wall you can help. If all you can do is sit and listen, you can help. Big disasters like Allison get a lot of attention. But a accident can come in any size. If a singular house burns, that's a major accident to the house that called it home. The chapter of Allison is that in serving each other, we serve our Lord. Our example of aid provides a shining testament to the unsaved. It will be generations before the citizen here forget Allison. I pray that the society of faith who calls themselves Christians never forget the practical ministry of service.

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Monday, September 10, 2012

Love relationship Jealousy - Friend Or Foe?

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If malice or envy were tangible and had a shape, it would be the shape of a boomerang. ~Charley Reese

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He that is not jealous is not in love. ~St. Augustine

The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves. ~William Penn, Some Fruits of Solitude, 1693

What is jealousy? What purpose does it serve in our lives and relationships? What drives us to come to be jealous? Is jealousy envy?

Jealousy is a reactive state that conveys the negative internal chatter and emotions of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an predicted loss of something that the man values, such as a relationship, friendship, or love. Jealousy often consists of a compound of fear-based emotions such as anger, resentment, abandonment, rejection, grief, and disgust... Just to name a few. Envy, on the other hand, is a reactive state of discontent and resentment fueled by and linked with a desire for obtaining the possessions or qualities of another... Sort of like an attempted energetic larceny. Larceny is defined in the dictionary as illegal taking and carrying away of personal property belonging to other with the purpose of depriving the owner of its possession. Does this sound familiar? Ever feel this way before? Truly, who has not... On the playground, at the high school dance, in house and public relationships, in friendships, on the sports team, or at your place of employment.

The roots of jealousy run deep in our evolutionary history, serving as a inherent deterrent to infidelity. Jealousy rears its ugly green-eyed head when a perceived threat is lurking in the perimeter of an intimate relationship. A primary other talks to other man at a party and smiles... A rival is born. A spouse goes on enterprise trip with a co-worker or boss of the opposite sex. We view the rival of our desired person's attentions as if they ooze an aura of special attributes or qualities that we think we could never have or possibly that we have yet to develop. Jealousy can be our intuition telling us to go within to realize something deeper about our own self or telling us to build a deeper level of communication with our friend, partner, spouse or colleague... Or it can lead us deeper into our shadows.

The shadow aspect of jealousy is that it can be so self-destructive or self-sabotaging when it creates behaviors that can drive away the connection or object we most desire. When we dance in the emotions of anger, resentment, or rage over a perceived real or imagined abandonment, we can unwittingly push the man away or, by our accusations of inherent infidelity, cause the man to contemplate: "Why not go ahead and commit the crime for which I am accused, tried and jailed already".

When we are preoccupied with how unfaithful others are to us, we come to be distracted from our own emotional pain. The "gift" of jealousy is that it is approximately always a signal to Look Within to listen to the Inner Still Small Voice. Only straight through contemplation can we gain clarity about the situation at hand and our true intentions fueling our reactive emotional state.

Are you feeling jealous? Red flags signaling jealousy contain feeling out of operate in a relationship, fear of losing your friend or lover, lack of trust, anger at real or imagined attention that other man is giving to something other than you (humans, animals, jobs, sports or hobbies).

What leads to jealousy? Jealousy is typically a sign of an insecure man and/or man in an insecure relationship. Jealously often stems from a sense of inadequacy or powerlessness, fear of the unknown, or anxiety about being unlovable. People often turn fear to anger, which they regulate by trying to operate a partner, friend, co-worker or child by violating their trust and rummaging straight through their personal belongings, phone, computer, Facebook/Twitter account, while possibly production accusations and using other tactics that unwittingly may drive them away emotionally and/or physically; thus creating a self-fulfilling prophecy that reflects their own worst fears.

All human emotions exist to help us recognize who and where we in effect are in the world of our own creation straight through the mirror of our own perceptions. Jealousy is a way to distract our self from our own negative thoughts or emotions (fear, guilt, shame, anger, resentment, feelings of abandonment) about our life. Jealousy doesn't necessarily have to do with love. You don't have to like man to feel jealous. It also comes from selfishness. Jealousy can be used as a mask in that some People who have been unfaithful them self will infer or accuse others of doing what they have done. People can use jealousy to operate a partner, controlling who they talk to, where and when they go, passage to finances, etc. In short, jealousy can be used to make People feel more noteworthy when they have low self-esteem and a sense of their own inadequacy or powerlessness. However, the real bite is that the more they try to soothe their emotions by being controlling, the more powerless they feel, because then they generate a dependency on their partner's response to feel good... A vicious circle.

At its worst, pathological jealousy can lead to obsessive and delusional thinking. Essentially, the more you incessantly chew on the same endless mind-chatter over and over, the less reality testing you are able to do. How could this not lead to huge errors in judgment, inferences and suspicions?

On the flip side, we often use jealousy as a test... Starting with our earliest peer relationships. What is sibling rivalry about anyway? We often provoke it in our house or our partner to test the strength of our bond. Jealousy appears to portion our level of caring in a relationship.

For instance, if you have been out on a few dates with a new love interest, a small dose of testing for jealousy can be a means of measuring the strength of interest by the other person. This might be done by stating that you can't go out on Saturday night because you have a previous engagement or other date. If the other man responds in a mildly jealous manner, you may realize this as an expression of caring or a portion of commitment. This could be used as a test as to whether it's worthwhile and safe to invest more time and emotion in this relationship. For some, the threat of losing an object of affection is a test of how much you desire it.

Tips to Combat Jealousy:

- Allow yourself to feel your basic fear/anger that is causing the reactive jealousy. Understand the feeling you are having. Sense where you feel it in your body. Is it in your stomach, chest, shoulders, throat? Once you have put a 'face' on the underpinnings of your jealousy and understood where it affects you in your body, it is time to begin to transform the fear, anger or other emotions behind the situation. We have a collection of guided and mindfulness meditations as well as Eft (Emotional free time Technique) tapping protocols for transforming the beliefs and emotions that keep us stuck in unhealthy patterns such as intense jealousy.

- After you have understood your emotion and where it is coming from, you may or may not wish to discuss your feelings with your partner, before you let your assumptions go too far. If you opt to discuss the issue with your loved one, be sure that you are expressing from your heart. Get into your heart first (check out our Loving Benefactor meditation at digstation.com or in our books) and set your goals for a constructive conversation. Don't partake in the 'blame game' by saying "You do/did this or that"; instead, take accountability for your emotions by saying "I feel this way when I think this". Recall that we are not a victim of any one or any thing except for our self; no one makes us jealous, we choose to be jealous.

- What are you studying about yourself from your jealousy? reconsider that we are reflections mirroring the world we create; and others will reflect back to us our own thoughts or beliefs in our relationships. Ask your self: "What is going on internally and why am I attracting this situation to me?" You may also ask: "What is the gift for me in this situation?" We have a extraordinary guided meditation to aid with connecting to Universal Wisdom to respond such questions and to see the clarity of any situation.

- Reconnect with your True Essence to feel your value, inner strengths and abilities. Download our True Essence guided meditation from the link on our website to digstation.com. (We also have a "Who Am I?" meditation that you can do with your partner in our books.) Once you have glimpsed your True Essence, you will find that you have no infer to ever be jealous of anything else. You are incredibly skilled, beautiful and talented just as you are. Besides, no one's attentions can truly be 'lured away' by other man unless the man has a desire to go to begin with.

- determine to have a nurturing connection with yourself. The Obstacle of Lack of Self-Love can be an impediment in any connection as you can only love man else as much as you love your self. We address this fully in our books and seminars and give easy to use exercises, tools and techniques for removing this roadblock. If we do not love, respect or have compassion for our own self, why would anything else have compassion for us whether as we are showing by our own actions that we are unworthy of respect or compassion.... Something to think about.

Mild jealousy can reestablish the base of our commitment in relationships. Intense or pathological jealousy in a connection can be a sign that it is time to do some very serious introspection to generate a more salutary connection that is filled with less drama and more joy and inner peace.

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August Forecast - Part 2! Uranian Astrology Horoscope For the Second Half of the Month

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I have to emphasize the aspects discussed are mundane. It does not mean you are in the line of fire, unless these planetary pictures are hitting your personal points.

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If you are interested in knowing how these planetary pictures are affecting you personally, I can be reached for appointments. Please check out my profile and visit my website for supplementary information.

Even astrologers are not immune to the transits.

The lunar eclipse on August 5th brought Hades and my Neptune into play. You guessed it -- a major water leak in my bathroom. As I write this, the plumbers are at work pulling down my bathroom wall and ceiling to get to the problem. I'm sharing this with you to let you know that Astrologers are not immune to bad aspects. They can influence any one of us depending upon how they hit an individual chart.

Of note this month is a major configuration that begins on August 18th and goes through August 24th. That planetary picture is 0 Cardinal + Saturn = Uranus - sudden events in the world. We may hear of the death of a known public figure, or supplementary news pertaining to an earlier death. Right after that configurations passes, someone else nasty planetary picture takes over - Saturn + Hades = Uranus. This can mean sudden losses of money, property or life.

Tuesday, August 18th. Nothing is carport today as the Sun remains opposite Neptune within orb, a respectable orb of less than a degree, and Mars is opposite Uranus. Be truthful not to get distracted from what you are doing, or an crisis can occur. Walk away from anyone who may try to bate you into an argument. If driving, drive defensively - you could encounter a form of road rage. Keep your cell phone handy at all times today. Electrical problem's as well as mechanical breakdowns are someone else manifestation of Mars, Uranus. With this negative configuration there is one ray of pleasantness. It is Mercury + Venus = Jupiter - optimistic, friendly and pleasant communications. A lovely evening can be in store for you tonight with man special.

Wednesday, August 19th has Sun/Neptune + Uranus = Mars important to an edgy/ nervous day. With Neptune in the picture, you don't know what is arrival down the pike, and the slightest misunderstanding can cause a sudden altercation. Again I have to warn you about the inherent for accidents. Be truthful at work, things are unstable and tempers can flair. It is a busy day for auto and appliance mend personal. If you do not have to drive today, Don'T! Venus + Jupiter = Saturn. Two money planets plus Saturn indicate a intriguing money day. Watch your spending today, and if you don't have to shop - don't! There are no real bargains at this moment.

Thursday, August 20th. The day starts with a new moon. If you have plans for a new venture I would wait a day or two to begin those plans because Uranus is mean mercury and Mars now. Mercury Mars indicates arguments, add Uranus into the picture, and you get sudden, erratic, loud disruption that can be violent. A slap in the face or a punch in the jaw can occur during a verbal interaction today. With this planetary picture in consequent accidents can occur, so be truthful of road rage. Late afternoon/early evening Mercury + Venus = Neptune, relax and have a drink with supper tonight to help publish the tensions of the day. Again, a word of warning -- limit your spending today. If you buy anything, even as small as a newspaper or magazine, count your change, and keep track of your spending. Be very aware of your wallet or purse - you can find yourself standing next to left-handed Louie.

Friday, August 21st has Sun + Node = Hades/ 0 Cardinal. Today, the media will emphasis the growth of the needy and homeless in the world. The stock market closes with the planetary picture of Venus + Mercury = Neptune, financial losses. What appeared to be promising will turn sour today. The evening will find many wanting to publish tensions. If out in public watch your belongings. If you are out for the evening, do not walk alone late at night. Make sure you are with a friend and stay sober, since the day ends with Sun 22 ½ to Saturn. With this combo, many may find themselves without plans this evening; rent a video, read a book.

Saturday, August 22nd Sun + Node = Hades/0 cardinal is still in effect. Be aware of who is walking or driving near you. This planetary picture has a criminal element to it. One of the meanings of Hades is nastiness or criminality, Nodes indicates connections, and Sun is the day. someone else interpretation of Hades is illness or injury, and it can find you in the hospital crisis room, so be careful. In the evening Mercury/Uranus + Neptune = Venus, socialize with friends tonight. Instead of wasting money at a restaurant, ask friends over and have everyone bring a separate dish. Pot-luck with wine. It could be a fun evening in more ways than one.

Sunday, August 23rd has Venus + Neptune = Uranus -- a lovely day to spend with friends. You could go to the beach or do something that is separate and relaxing. Many will be sharing with friends on the Internet. Make sure that whoever you talk to on the net is truly your friend, especially if you've never met him/her. If you are complex with an Internet dating service, make sure to check out anyone you are talking to before you meet them in person. When you do meet him/her for the first time, meet in a public place like a coffee shop or restaurant. With Venus and Mars, male and female have Sun, Hades, Node, Neptune and Uranus traveling with each other. Be truthful out there.

Monday, August 24th. The day begins with Mars quadrate Hades, nasty acts, that can consist of murder. This Mars Hades will be at the mean of 0 Cardinal/Mercury. The public is in a nasty vile murderous mood, not necessarily in a literal way. Because Hades is complex in this planetary picture, an angry mood may have to do with the health care bill. someone else meaning for Hades is sickness, and disease. With Mercury and Venus still traveling in sextile to each other, the word being promoted is that this bill is good for you, try it you will like it. This message will not alleviate the disappointment as Saturn + Mercury, Mars, Hades = Uranus. Anger and disappointment will rule the day. The funny thing is that the day will end with Venus 22 ½ to Jupiter. The stock market will probably close up due to this aspect.

Tuesday August 25th will be an unstable and tense day with the Sun 22 ½ to Uranus. In the afternoon Mars and Mercury will be 0 Cardinal, and when that occurs they will be mean Pluto/Hades. Mercury, Mars on the cardinal axis is angry verbal confrontation in public. Add Pluto and Hades to the mix, we have public outcry, due to the general feels of not be treated honestly, and a sense of decadence by those in power.

Wednesday August 26th begins with Mercury + Pluto = Mars. Whenever Mars and Pluto are combined, and in this case they are in opposition to each other, with no signs of unavoidable change rage is expressed. Add Mercury to the picture we have verbal rage can lead to an angry explosion. Since Pluto is still related to 0 Cardinal and Hades, battles in the Mideast can be reignited as well. Venus will change sign and will be 22 ½ to Jupiter/Neptune, be truthful of reckless summer sales spending. Do not buy it if you do not need it.

Thursday August 27th the Sun will be 22 ½ to the mean of Uranus/Hades. Danger lurks today, be careful, disappointment causes people to act erratically. 0 Cardinal + Cupido = Saturn, do not let your disappointment lead to house brake down, that can lead to house brake up, like a divorce. Dissolving of groups either it be social/friends or work teams. The Sun will also be mean Zeus/Admetos, eke out a new starting to a20new venture is my advice to those who feel they are in a rut. At day's end Venus will be 22 ½ to Neptune, the weekend will begin early for some. For others it would be good to find a way to relax this evening, with friends with some wine, cheese, laughs, music and dancing.

Friday August 28th, Venus will be 22 ½ to the mean of Neptune/Admetos, this is the starting to the last week in August, production some aware that the summer is practically over. This is a good day for women to begin some degree changes in their lives, especially in the artistic realm. The stock market will close either down a little or stay=2 0the same.

Saturday August 29th, Zeus + Admetos = Venus, do not exertion any big projects... Enjoy small pleasures. Take in the scenery, take some photos to post on your Facebook page and enjoy. Mercury will be quadrate to Mars, avoid arguments at all cost, and be truthful driving.

Sunday the 30th, Sun will be 22 ½ to 0 Cardinal which is still mean Pluto/Hades. We could hear some bad news about Ted Kennedy; he could take a turn for the worse. What happens today will be played out in the public eye. Mercury/Mars will be 22 ½ to Apollon/Vulcanus, There will be a lot of news for the media to report.

Monday August 31st, today begins with Sun 22 ½ to Pluto, a day of power plays and manipulation. Do not react, or allow the games played to consequent you. Do not exertion to operate anything, or anyone's behavior and you will be in control. If anyone is forced through like the health bill, would be a bad idea since Mercury is getting ready to go retrograde in someone else week. The day ends with Mercury 45 to Jupiter, some good news, lending itself to a pleasant evening.

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Life on the Internet

I sold my car last week. I didn't go to a garage. For the first time I advertised on a motoring site on the internet. The advert was located on Saturday; I had a phone call on Monday; they came to see it on Tuesday, handed me a bundle of £50 notes and filled in the suitable forms. I hurriedly emptied the car and it was driven off by its new owner. And all this was possible because of the internet. That got me thinking. Where are we going? Is the internet going to take over the world? Will machines rule our lives?
What do you use the internet for?

I know that even though I am considered a silver surfer, I use the power of the internet for a variety of tasks. I have bought a car using my computer to source it and am doing so again this Friday. I have just booked my summer holiday using the same formula and will book my Channel ferry crossing as soon as I collect my car. I can't remember the last time I booked a holiday using a trip agent. I have to collect my car from London and so I bought my tickets on-line. I had to convert the assurance details so the new course was sent by email for me to download and print. I bought my tax disk on the web and will do so again.

I use eBay to buy and sell a variety of items. I bought and sold Victorian postcards. The cards were purchased at an online auction where you can listen live to the auctioneer taking bids. You click on a button and your bid is automatically registered. I have set up two websites. My first sold antiques, art and collectables. It wasn't very flourishing but covered my costs. My new site sells condition products, beauty products, jewellery and collectables. It is aimed at the over 55 age group but has items for others too. Most of the stock was acquired from wholesale companies which were found by surfing the internet. My partner has bought books, clothes, shoes, paint rollers, dog beds and a variety of miscellaneous items.

I haven't used the home food shopping services as there are only two of us and shopping isn't too much of a chore. Those with larger families must find it easier to order by computer, have the goods delivered to your door and avoid having to trail children round the supermarket wanting every toy and sweet they see.

What else does the world wide web offer? Ah, yes! I met my partner through an on-line dating site. Some population scoff at the idea of a sixty-ish 'old man' chatting to members of the opposite sex on a computer. Well it worked. I found a lovely, moving woman who now shares my home and we are very happy. There are dangers and lessons to be learned about internet dating sites. Women especially have to be just about meeting for the first time. Don't give out too much information, such as phone numbers and home addresses until you are sure it is safe to do so. You won't surely know your 'date' until you meet, so make sure it is in a safe place and friends know where you are and when you will be back. I found the whole sense very enjoyable though there were some problems to overcome. It may be true; you have to kiss a few frogs before you find prince charming (not literally). Don't rule for second best.

I haven't yet mentioned email and public networking sites. Of course I use email for personal as well as firm use. It's so suitable and roughly instant. I have signed up for Facebook and Twitter but don't use them. I write a blog which no-one visits. I write articles which are read but still no-one uses the links to my site.

Where do we go from here? I can see that town centres might become residential areas with only places of entertainment and the occasional small shop dotted around. You can't get your hair styled over the internet. Most items you need could be ordered and delivered to your door. We will adjust our way of living by browsing and buying. We should have more freedom time and be able to go out more into the countryside. We can even rehearsal by following some computer programme.

What about transport? Will we be able to sit in our vehicle, programme in a destination and sit back while we are driven there using current Satellite Navigation? The technology is available. Space travel, private pods to live in; homes under the sea; anything is possible?

What should we learn from this? Will we become too reliant on machines? I'm no Jules Verne. I can't predict the future? Let's hear you ideas. What changes will there be in 50 years time?

advice Life on the Internet advice

All About Chicago Restaurants

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Chicago is a big-time sports town with die hard fans for their Bears, Bulls, Cubs, and the World Champion Chicago White Sox. Even if you don't like baseball, you'll have the time of your life just like Ferris Bueller as you take in a Cubs game at Wrigley. The Windy City does a nice job blending in the new while maintaining its old world charm. Incorporated as a town in 1833, Chicago has grown to be the nation's third-largest city (with a people of more than 3 million), the birthplace of the first skyscraper and one of the few international Us cities. Chicago today offers a truly cosmopolitan flare that adds to any visitor's big-city adventure - a beautiful city in the Midwest heartland that radiates a spirit of energy.

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With 77 neighborhoods (yes, we did say 77), you can go from one to the next in a split second before you realize you're in a different area with completely new sights and sounds. Having unmistakable character, each of this city's neighborhoods brings a whole new array of shops, restaurants, attractions, historical elements, and intrigue.

Shopping on Michigan Ave. Is truly magnificent, so make sure you work that into the plan.

Chicago is also known for its deep dish pizza, so you must try some while in town. Yes, the toppings are buried under the sauce, but trust us...it is fantabulous and worth the 40 little wait. We like Gino's East and Giordanno's, but as you will see there are many other solid choices.

Whether you want to cozy up in a casual neighborhood bar or don your best black dress for some late night cocktails, Chicago has it all! Here are just some of our journeyPod Picks:

Alinea - With a kitchen filled with the country's top culinary awards, risk-taking super-chef Grant Achatz has upped the ante in Chicago with these avant-garde culinary creations. A progressive American bistro contribution a multi-sensory prix fix degustation menu of 12 or 24 courses, the fare at Alinea causes a obvious awe and "wow" by everyone who shares the sense in dining here. The 24 procedure menu is called the "tour" and is as much a marathon as it is a meal, generally taking nearly four or five hours to finish. Jackets are recommended, jeans not allowed. And remember - at Alinea, you come hungry, and leave... Well, with your wallet a lot thinner. Alinea is settled at 1723 N. Halsted St. (at Willow St.).

NoMi (Chi - Gold Coast/Streeterville) - settled on the 7th floor of the Park Hyatt Hotel, NoMi serves upscale contemporary French global cuisine with an Asian twist. Boasting striking views of Michigan Avenue and Lake Michigan, this contemporary bistro offers indoor and outdoor seating, and an adjoining swanky lounge for after-dinner drinks. The bistro is also known for its high-end, high-ticket tea offerings that contain rare and little leaves including vintage Pu-erh, keep and display teas that range from up to 0 a pop. Hint: Tables 30-37 offer the best Magnificent Mile views. NoMi can be found at 800 N. Michigan Ave. (at Chicago Ave.).

mk the bistro (River North) - Rated by Zagat as the "place to go back to as often as possible" - this contemporary neighborhood favorite attracts an upscale crowd with its consistently yummy new American cuisine - with global influences that focus on the freshest ingredients available. Exposed brick and wood beams prove to be an elegant increasing to this two-story space that features a bar, lounge and two dining rooms. For starters, try the lobster soup poured tableside over lobster meat; and for dinner, the seared rare ahi tuna. The desserts don't disappoint either - the "Cake and Shake" - a mini vanilla milkshake served with buttermilk chocolate cake will have you smiling all night long! The bistro is settled at 868 N Franklin St. (at Chestnut St.).

Follia (West Loop) - A chic and icy-cool destination in the gritty Fulton road storage district, Folia is a new Italian bistro that all the time buzzing with the hip young crowd and corporate diners. Just about all on the menu here scores, from the paper-thin prosciutto and mushroom pizza to the risotto Milanese and the taglioni with pesto and meat sauces. All the desserts are made in-house and are worth the calories. For all you chocolate addicts out there - try the chocolate lava cake (even though Follia's most favorite is the tiramisu-like cake with amaretto and mascarpone cheese). Just don't be alarmed when you coming the front door of the place - you'll see stylishly dressed mannequins peering back at you. (The bistro displays art and fashions by local college students that you can purchase, or admire while you wait for a table.) Follia is settled at 953 W. Fulton market (at Morgan St.).

Landmark (Lincoln Park) - Fine dining meets hip and bustling bar/lounge scene at this multi-level space settled in the Lincoln Park/Clybourn Corridor. A perfect night spot that draws more than just a crowd of Steppenwolf theater-goers (located just over the street), Landmark boasts multiple kitchens contribution its diners innumerable menu options like grilled strip steak and pork chops, or pizza and lobster club sandwiches. Try the signature cocktails at Landmark or old favorites like a Cosmo made with Orange Grey Goose or a Bellini. The place is settled at 1633 N. Halsted St.

Sushi Wabi - Voted "Best Sushi in Chicago" by Chicago Tribune readers, Sushi Wabi is the city's original hipster sushi hot spot - its industrial (wood-block and steel tables), its loud, its filled with well-heeled, well-dressed locals who dig the clubby vibe and the Dj-spun music (nightly from 7pm to 11pm) while chowing down on a mean plate of maki. If you need any suggestions, order the: dragon roll, spicy shrimp and tuna rolls, spider roll and the gyu negima--scallions rolled in slices of marinated beef, all of which are the restaurant's specialties. Sushi Wabi is settled at 842 W. Randolph St. (at Halsted St.).

Tru (Chi - Gold Coast/Streeterville) - Talk about fine dining! Set in an open, airy loft space that could almost double as an art gallery, Tru marries style, sophistications and substance - contribution progressive French cuisine (that's more like playful works of art) and impeccable service. Served on a spectacular array of non-traditional surfaces produced by local and international artists, the décor is offset by the stark white walls adorned by contemporary art pieces (among which you'll see an original Warhol). Food is as yummy here, as it is gorgeous; and specialties include: foie gras with pineapple relish and venison loin with creamed corn. The desserts are dreamy (the bistro even accepts dessert-only reservations), and contain selections like quince ice cream float with sour cherries, house-made lollipops and chocolate pot de-crème. Jackets here are required, as are reservations! The bistro is settled at 676 North Saint Clair St. (at Huron St.).

David Burke's Primehouse (River North) - settled in the River North's James Chicago Hotel, David Burke's Primehouse is a mecca for all meat aficionados. Known for dry-aging steaks on the premises in its own salt cave (a climatic characteristic and humidity-controlled room fitted with salt tiles), the bistro is refined, but not stuffy - attracting a see-and-be-seen crowd. And don't just come for the steaks! Burke's famed dishes, like the spicy "angry lobster" and "Kobe beef sashimi" are delectable. Just make sure you save room for the "cheesecake lollipops"! The James Hotel is settled at 616 N. Rush St. (at Ontario St.).

Japonais (River West) - One of the city's trendiest dining destinations. Japonais offers a sensuous scene and Euro-Asian fare that's got foodies and fashionistas in Chi-town buzzing. The dishes and the décor at this 300-seat, industrial-chic space (with 2 dining rooms, a sushi bar and downstairs lounge and patio) is first-class. Japonais boasts four sensuous environments: a red (tables and sushi bar) and green (lounge-y with a wall of flames) room; a subterranean lounge; and a riverfront terrace - an invitingly dreamy setting of draped daybeds and candlelight. The menu takes creative license with original Japanese fare and creates a hot and cold mix of not-to-be-missed specialties, like the Kobe carpaccio, lobster spring rolls, the six seafood tartars and the maki rolls. Though aid has been an issue, the food, décor and pretty cocktails you'll drink here make up for it - try the "Floating Orchids" or choose from the broad sake menu. At 600 W. Chicago Ave. (at Larrabee St.).

Gibson's Bar and Steakhouse (Chi - Gold Coast/Streeterville) - Named after the Gibson martini (garnished with an onion), this bar and bistro commemorates all things big and bigger. Known for its "big martinis, big steaks and big desserts" - Gibsons has long been known to have patrons hooked after just one visit. Try the strawberry shortcake or the "turtle" chocolate-nut-caramel concoction. Reservations are strongly recommended, or be prepared to wait. Gibsons Bar and Steakhouse is settled at 1028 North Rush (at Oak St.).

Narcisse (River North) - A previous champagne n' caviar bar, Narcisse has gotten serious about fine dining. A swanky hot spot with de facto interesting eats, drinks, décor and clientele, it boasts a excellent champagne variety and four-star meals. Start with the sturgeon roe, and then move on to the filet mignon or grilled ostrich. Narcisse offers more than 100 different bubbly choices and a slew of signature cocktails, like the Champagne Marquis, a mix of Perrier-Jouet champagne, Godiva chocolate liqueur and Cuerenta Y Tres (pls don't call it Liquor 43 like the tourists). Psst.... No sneakers, no hats, no athletic gear, no jeans. The bistro is settled at 710 North Clark St. (at first-rate St.).

Piece (Bucktown) - Where else can you create your own East Coast, thin-crust style pizza in a trendy and casual bar atmosphere? With two sunken lounge areas, a long bar, and a whole of booths and tables, Piece also features games - shown on projection screens and Tv's, live Jazz on Wednesdays, karaoke night Thursdays, and live bands on Saturdays. The place also has an perfect option of beers on tap that include: Hoegaarden, Onion Pale Ale, Goose Island and Guinness. If you're more Dockers, than Dkny - make your way here. Piece is settled at 1927 W North Ave. (at Winchester Ave.).

LuxBar (Chi - Gold Coast/Streeterville) - A neighborhood saloon, LuxBar captures an elegance and simplicity with its stone, glass brass and wood to a late-30's business crowd. Artisanal in style, the menu offers original comfort food and some new contemporary favorites mixed in; try Kobe burger with foie gras. The bar serves specialty cocktails and classics all made from natural, fresh ingredients. (The staff here has also been trained in the buyer care doctrine that has made Gibson's Steakhouse famed for legendary service.). If you can, grab a seat near the marble fireplace in the back of the room - it adds intimacy to a meal, while the floor-to-ceiling front windows offer great people-watching. LuxBar is settled at 18 East Bellevue (at State St.).

Zapatista (Chi - South Loop) - The Mexican fare at this latest rustic-like bistro in the South Loop is made with passion, heart & soul. The menu variety ranges from burritos, tacos & enchiladas to specialties like Camarones Sinaloa & Carne a la Parrilla, and guacamole made table-side. With its slow-turning fans, amped-up mariachi tunes and black & white photos, Zapatista is a interesting cantina with indoor/outdoor seating that serves some of the finest ability tequilas ready (with your option of 50 here); not to mention, their specialty drink list is amazing. Try the Azul y Oro - a blue margarita made with Gran Gala orange liquor and La Revolucion with grenadine and chile piquin. settled at 1307 South Wabash (13th St.).

Le Colonial (Chi - Gold Coast/Streeterville) - If you're seeing to be movable to someone else time and place, Le Colonial vividly captures the beauty, romance and spirit of 1920's French-Colonial Southeast Asia. Recline beneath a palm tree on a cushy rattan chair, while surrounded with luxurious décor at this Chi-town destination. With a well-to-do crowd and, a dining area on one floor and a lounge upstairs, this bistro is the perfect setting for a group conference or a romantic evening for two. Boasting authentic Vietnamese cuisine on the menu, all the dishes are exquisite. Try the sea scallops, filet mignon and the Vietnamese tapioca for dessert. Le Colonial is settled at 937 North Rush St. (Cross Street: Walton Pl.).

Blackbird (Chi - Downtown) - Serving French and American cuisine to a consistently packed house (daily), Blackbird is very trendy and minimalist - with bare white walls and a singular banquette that spans the distance of the room. The menu here (thanks to chef extraordinaire Paul Kahan) is dedicated to adventurous, market-fresh fare. Nearly every dish is a masterpiece! Try the creamy foie gras, the venison salad or the signature bouillabaisse. Just make sure you save enough room afterwards for what may be Chicago's best bread pudding! Blackbird is settled at 619 W Randolph St. (at Desplaines and Jefferson Sts.).

Twisted Lizard (Lincoln Park/DePaul) - A interesting Mexican bistro that caters to young professionals who love to feast on fresh fajitas, enchiladas, chimichangas, burritos and "sincronizadas" (layered flour tortillas filled with re-fried black beans and option of meat or vegetables). The décor is festive (surprise, surprise) and the cheerful Mexican music lends a fiesta-like ambiance to the ever-flowing margaritas (there are eight different types of margaritas served by the pitcher and more than 20 brands of tequila for building even more margaritas). Just make sure you go early or be prepared to wait (the citrusy margaritas and fresh chips and salsa make it worthwhile) at this basement-level restaurant. Twisted Lizard is settled at 1964 North Sheffield Ave. (at Armitage Ave.).

Yoshi's Café - formerly one of Chi-town's most exclusive dining spots, Yoshi's has now adopted a more casual (and less expensive) vibe. The eclectic fusion menu is extraordinary and features dishes that could be described having Japanese, Italian, French and American influences. Try the duck liver mousse pâté and house-cured salmon sushi, or the artichoke and radicchio risotto. Don't miss the Skyy Ginger cosmo either - its made with gingered lime juice, Skyy vodka and Cointreau, and garnished with fresh ginger. Yoshi's Café is settled at 3257 N. Halsted St. (at. Melrose St.).

Tavern on Rush (River North) - If you're seeing for something that's part restaurant, part lounge, Tavern on Rush offers both. With big steaks and a clubby atmosphere, this place draws a 30-something crowd to its country-club décor, leather accents and open kitchen. Though you might expect a dress code, there isn't one (which means you'll see blue jeans and the most high-priced work suits). The first-rate American menu doesn't disappoint with its great option of steak and seafood options. And, if you're in the mood for a cocktail - go for the martini, theirs are big enough to swim in! Taven on Rush is settled at 1031 N. Rush St. (bet. E. Cedar St. And E. Bellevue Pl.).

Avec - If you're seeing for a wine bar with great food, and you don't mind rubbing elbows with your neighbors at long group tables, Avec is the place. The menu here focuses on small and large sharing plates of rustic, Mediterranean "peasant foods" - with many dishes cooked in a wood-burning oven and served in cast-iron pots. Try the house-marinated olives, chorizo-stuffed dates, the thin focaccia with truffle oil or the roasted chicken thigh panzanella salad. Avec also boasts a cheese cave with a variety of artisan cheeses from France, Portugal, Spain and Italy. Avec is settled at 615 W. Randolph St. (at Jefferson St.).

X/O Chicago - This loungy place is named after the cognac designation (Xo stands for "extra old" - the superior designation). The eclectic menu inflects global influences and generally focuses on small sharable plates that change frequently, based on the season. The menu is divided into three "courses" - starting with light dishes like the shrimp salad; progressing into second procedure like foie gras; and then the third procedure with choices like rib-eye steak with X/O sauce. For all you sweetmeat lovers: try the Chocolate Orgasm (think puffy chocolate beignets and flourless chocolate cake). settled at 3441 N Halsted St. (at Newport Ave.).

Fireplace Inn (Old Town) - An Old Town convention specializing in "Flinstone-sized" fall-off-the-bone Bbq baby back ribs, Fireplace Inn has been around since 1969. Boasting a casual ski-lodge-like vibe inside, and an all-season patio (with retractable roof) featuring 16 satellite-fed televisions outside, the Fireplace Inn satisfies many with its updated old-school environment. The menu also offers steak specialties, seafood and salads. If you're not in the mood for ribs, go for the Bbq chicken with mashed potatoes and gravy. settled at 1448 N. Wells St. (at Schiller).

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Sunday, September 9, 2012

9 Traits of Results Eager Negotiators

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1. Pressure

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How is 9 Traits of Results Eager Negotiators

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All good negotiators aim to put pressure on the citizen they're negotiating with. The pressure is designed to make them give way to your demands or requests or at the very least, to offer concessions to their requirements.

So whenever you're negotiating, try to think about some pressure you can create. Effective negotiators don't pile on the pressure with aggression or games, they create it purposely and cleverly. And the two most techniques they use are time and their own Inner Game control.

Time or lack if it, is the one pressure that all negotiators use. I like to buy my goods towards the end of month when most salespeople's commission periods are ending. They want to get as many sales as inherent in the last few days of the month to collect big fat commissions. So I like to negotiate for dishwashers, Tvs and such around the end of the month to create this pressure.

Recently a fantastic example of time-pressure negotiating occurred in the English Premiership Football League and the pressure created earned one side £20 million. Not bad. The Premiership operates a transfer window of about a month where clubs can buy and sell players, they are not allowed to deal with players face of the window.

This creates pressure in its own right and this year Liverpool and Chelsea played out a cracker. The player, Fernando Torres, Spanish International extraordinaire was put up for sale and Chelsea said they were interested. They offered £30 million. Liverpool gave a great verbal and optical flinch to this offer, giving the impression they weren't interested.

And the player was now not for sale, superior example of not being desperate either. They waited, and waited until the last day of the transfer window appeared. They demanded £50 million. They patiently awaited Chelsea's response. Chelsea, whose season was crumbling around them, were very keen to collect a player of Torres's undoubted scoring ability, felt the pressure. The clock ticked away as clocks do and sure sufficient at 5 minutes to midnight on the last day of the transfer window, the pressure became too much and they caved in, according the request price to Liverpool.

Just before midnight the deal was sealed and Torres exchanged hands for £50 million, and a mere £20 million more than Chelsea started out at. That's pressure for you.

The other form of pressure comes from within. Good negotiators learn how to operate their Inner Game and the pressure this puts on you to collect a deal at all costs. One of the best ways to do this is not to "cross the line". In other words, convince your brain that you need the deal and now. Do that and you've crossed the line and have to do a deal. That makes you negotiate less effectively because the slightest amount of pressure put on you by the other side will make you cave in.

A strategy to use here is the Batna, the best alternative to a negotiated agreement. Have a plan B up your sleeves so if the deal isn't looking good, you can calmly walk away. Always have your walk away power. Poor Chelsea didn't have this power and therefore caved into Liverpool's demands.

2. Growth desire

This is a selling skill as well as a negotiating tactic. Simply to Growth the desire from the someone you're looking to negotiate with means they might be more inclined to accept your terms or to sell out their demands.

Our Pedigree dog Brodie has just had pups and we're in the process of looking good homes for them, for a small fee of course. We've generated quite a bit of request with our website, an entry in the Kennel Club site and a Facebook page. We're currently arranging for visits and such from prospective new owners and this is becoming a logistical nightmare.

This morning I recommend to Claire that we hold an open day on a specific Saturday between 9am and 5pm for all prospective citizen to come visit at a time to suit them.

We used to do the same in the estate department business and it worked on a logistical level but also on a psychological plane. citizen saw other citizen being concerned in the same house and this created request for the product. We were a bit naughty because we often invited friends and family over to Growth the numbers of citizen in the house. And I even heard of a tactic where specific appointments were made for viewers and the appointment times would clash, so as we were showing someone around the house, someone else would turn up to view as well. Bit naughty that one, I totally condone that tactic, but remember it in case someone uses it on you, and they will.

When I explained the tactic to Claire with the puppies, she was horrified and needless to say, we're not doing an open house for the puppies. Besides all the citizen traipsing straight through would upset Brodie.

3. Have a structure

Powerful negotiators know that a process, a buildings is what's needed in negotiation. Even the smallest deals, those chronic minutes, should corollary a process. The buildings is even more vital for those long drawn out negotiations. In your buildings you should factor in preparation, good negotiators do.

Last year, I had a call from a Middle Eastern business request if I would do some talks over at their form later in the year. Simply I said yes, it was a privilege, and then fixed up a negotiation call to thrash out the covenant and terms.

Now I knew nothing of them, searched the web, still unclear. How could I negotiate with an organisation I knew nothing of, so I hired an Agent in the country, who was happy to take a cut, but assured me he could escort the negotiations for me as he knew their culture and he could explore the Institute.

He reported back. Good news. They were a weighty Government organisation with budgets for foreign speakers, very keen for Uk based speakers as well. He even offered to negotiate for me as he spoke the language and knew their customs.

As a corollary we negotiated a very good deal for both parties, without the inside knowledge of my agent I doubt if I would've negotiated such a deal, which brings me onto the next characteristic - a desire for a win-win result.

4. Desire a win-win

Winning at all costs, beat the competition, grind them down, hammer out a cracking deal regardless, pull the wool over their eyes...just annoys people, if you want a long term deal, win-win is the only way.

Ok, both parties won't have what they both want entirely. Both parties should perform most of their aims and have conceded a limited as well, but both parties must feel they have come out in a win-win situation. This is why establishment is so important for both sides.

Knowing the minimum you'd accept, your ideal position and a middle ground of what you'll be happy to accept, helps with a win-win. Since both parties are able to concede in clear areas, give in others, means finally both sides get some benefit.

5. Build trust

Effective negotiators have trust on their side and work on providing trust in the dealings with the other side. Trust comes from rapport, working together, having a believable proposition, actively seeking a win-win, being open, inclusive, sharing.

Trust comes from following a buildings which includes an first consulation where both party's shopping list is put on the table without any negotiation at that stage. Open questions to seek out what they're looking for to build trust. With trust comes open negotiation.

The most hurdle to a prosperous outcome is risk, where there's no trust, you see risk and this causes less concessions and more focusing on one or too variables, such as price.

6. Know that citizen Always want dissimilar things

And sometimes to be a great negotiator you've got to find out what these are. Yes they'll tell you their main needs and demands...but have you been able to get the smaller less tangible needs from them.

A few years' ago I decided to cancel my gym membership and take up jogging in the countryside surrounding my home. This is a great tactic in the summer months, not so good in the dark and dismal winter. So I found myself out running during the day and the time needed - hour plus shower time - clashing with other family demands on my time.

My wife began putting pressure on me to do other family tasks and my runs took a back seat until I realised that my wife wanted dissimilar things.

I offered to take our dog Brodie along with me on my runs. Most of the way is fields and footpaths, totally off road, so Brodie could run alongside me and then run off over the fields. A limited bit of training from my part and this could work.

The outcome? My wife is totally happy now for me to go running any time during the day as long as Brodie comes with me.

You see citizen want dissimilar things. Effective negotiators seek out these dissimilar things and offer concessions or extras particularly if they have no cost to them but give weighty value to the other side. Taking Brodie on my runs costs me nothing, apart from some training, but to my wife this offers huge benefits.

7. Always get a concession

The rule that powerful negotiators use is to Always seek a concession whenever they give something away. This should become a habit.

Always seek something, however small, when contribution a concession. So the phrase "If we do this, then would you do this". It's a habit thing.

Just before Christmas, I was instructed to book up a Boxing Day treat for our 12 guests and the treat was Rubber Tubing at our local ski centre. The idea is you jump on a rubber tyre that goes hurtling down the ski slope at ferocious speeds.

I wanted to book 12 places at 12 o'clock noon. Bearing in mind we had free snow all over the county at the time and the forecast was for more, the allure of the ski slope was not as magnetic as normal.

They wanted a deposit to collect the booking which is normal practice, but I found myself saying "ok, I can give you a deposit, but what sort of discount can you offer me if I do so?"

It worked. She gave me a 10% discount just for asking, where thousands of citizen don't.

Remember Always seek a concession if you give something away.

"Can you pay by card sir?" "I can, but what discount can you give me if I do?"

It works

8. Believe in uncomfortableness

All good negotiators tell me that when they are negotiating well, they have an uneasy sense of uncomfortableness. That feeling in the tummy when you are worried about what someone thinks about you, either you've overstepped the mark, asked for too much, about to be thrown out of the store. Only then do you know that you are truly negotiating.

So welcome the feeling, seek it out and remember all good negotiators feel unease and uncomfortable.

Last year I wanted to take on some actors for some training. The firm was recommended to me but their fee was slightly more than my client had budgeted to pay. We talked about concessions and things I could give that cost me limited but provided value to them and we started the final negotiation...on email.

I didn't think it was inherent but we did it. At one point, following a invite with a small concession in return, the other chap emailed back to say he was going to think about it and would get back to me. Of procedure it went quiet; having no emails arrival back meant it was seriously quiet. Time trickled on as it does creating pressure and I began to feel very very uncomfortable.

Had I gone too far, asked for too much, could he refuse the work, had he a walk away plan B - his Batna. I did, but time was getting close to the seminars and securing an additional one firms' services would have been tricky.

Boy, was it uncomfortable and didn't feel good at all. But I knew that uncomfortableness was deliberate and it meant we were negotiating. He came back later, thorough the offer and we moved the sale to the next step.

9. Higher Authority

Seasoned negotiators realise that pressure is a strategy that brings results and the more pressure you can put on the someone without losing trust and rapport, the better. And that's the fine equilibrium - pressure and trust and rapport. So if we personally pile on the pressure we might lose the trust.

Not good.

The write back is to spin the negotiation to some form of higher authority. someone who has the say to approve or disapprove the negotiation outcome. This can be an ego thing since most citizen like to think they have the power but the higher authority is merely a tactic used.

Car booting is a major enjoyment for me and I love selling our wares on the stalls. someone asks me the price of an item and I refer to the marker on the item and that becomes the higher authority. Other stall holders when asked the same question, look at the person, look at the item and then apologetically state the price that they've just made up. No wonder citizen negotiate the price down in these circumstances

Anything or someone or committee that you can refer the details to becomes a higher authority that you can bring in to put pressure on the other someone without losing the trust you've built up.

Principles and values can be used. When clients ask me about my fees I sometimes refer to fee integrity and having a coarse fee buildings for all clients, which is true.

Your higher authority can also be a bad guy and you remain the good guy. This puts extra pressure on. We had some major construction work completed recently and our manufacturer was Always arrival to me to propose short cuts or mention other problems that needed fixing. My higher authority was my wife and I would refer to Claire whenever Norman wanted something I didn't want to give him.

Because Claire rarely saw Norman, I painted the photograph of her being a hard nut to crack. "Claire won't like that Norman, but I'll check later". It worked.

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